Last week I touched on family systems, and I wanted to further discuss how families actually have their own cultures and traditions.When we think of culture we may just think of people from foreign countries that may wear very distinct items of clothing, or perform certain rituals among other things. However, there are also family cultures in each and every household. We may have certain traditions or just simple things we do in our family that are different from other households. In my house, it is normal for whoever dirtied a dish to clean it themselves. Whereas at some of my friends' houses, they have a designated person to wash the dishes that night or for that week. We also try as often as we can to sit down together as a family for dinner and typically discuss our days or how we can help each other out if someone is struggling. Other people may be either too busy to have family dinner or it is just custom for them to all eat on their own at different times. Some families enjoy eating out often while others make home cooked meals. A chore list may be implicated for some and others may not have specific assignments. In some households, it is "youngest go first" or "ladies go first." The culture or traditions in your family may be something passed down from generations or something your parents wanted to start. How does your family system work? What sort of traditions would you want to pass on? For me, it is important to get together with my family and make sure we are able to enjoy each others company and support one another. Sunday family dinner is something I would love to be able to continue with my own family in the future. I want to grow with my family and not grow apart. I want to strengthen my relationships with each member of my family. In doing so, I think we will be able to work significantly better together.

Now I would like to switch gears a little bit and talk about a "hot topic" especially in America. While reading an excerpt from, "The Costs of Getting Ahead," by Martica Bacallao and Paul Smokowski, I learned about how the systems in immigrant families drastically change. Unfortunately, there are many family systems and cultures that are being broken down during the transition from foreign countries to the United States. Parents wanting a better life for their young children attempt to make the trip over to America- a place full of opportunity. Typically the father makes the journey across the border and then attempts to find work so he can pay for the rest of his family to make the expensive and risky trip down. Often, he cannot find sufficient work and can barely make ends meet- let alone continually send money to his family back home. Many immigrants find themselves having to work much lower ranked jobs, as employers do not want to risk their companies being sued. These immigrants need to possess a worker's visa in order to legally work for their employers. Therefore if they are hired, the employers have to keep them in low ranking jobs with minimal pay, to keep them under the radar. Many families are separated for months, even years, longer than they initially anticipated. Consequently, these families separated in two different countries, do not have much contact and grow apart. Back home, the mother may have to work as well, which can further distance her from her children. Now the children do not see their father and have significantly reduced time with their mother. This can be a significant change for families who see each other frequently as they are unable to get together nearly as often. If enough money is eventually saved, the rest of the family takes the risk of coming over. They could get kidnapped, abused, sent back home, or even killed in their attempt. Once across the border and finally reunited, there can be tension in the home as living circumstances shift from what they once were. Being separated for so long can cause a divide between the father, and the mother and children. On top of that, these immigrant families have to share homes with other families. This can force them to change their family traditions and customs even more. For these families, their whole world is changed and may be left thinking their move was not worth it. It can be extremely difficult for these people to adjust. If I were placed in a similar situation I would surely miss how things used to be. I would miss having a functioning household with relationships that were not strained. Learning all this about immigrant families made me appreciate my situation even more. Although we are far from perfect and have many flaws in our family system, I am very appreciative of my circumstances.